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Original posting of Episode 13:

Date: 7 Jan 97 08:44:26 GMT
From: kmp@harlequin.com (Kent Pitman)
Newsgroups: rec.arts.tv.soaps.cbs
Subject: Y&R: Another Way Out, episode 13
Message-ID: <KMP.97Jan7084426@romulus.harlequin.com>

"Another Way Out" takes plotline state at time of publication and shows that
there are interesting places right around the corner.  The goal, besides
having some fun with good-natured parody, is to challenge the notion that we
must be mired in certain tired plotlines for months just to have a good time.
There is always another way out...

   Archives of this and older episodes of "Another Way Out"
    as well as the more serious "morals" that underly them,
    can be found at:  http://world.std.com/~pitman/awo/index.html

INSIDE... * New clues for an age-old crime
        * A new crime for some age-old clues
      * Age-old cluelessness that's a crime itself

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ANOTHER WAY OUT, Episode 13, 07-Jan-97  by Kent Pitman (kmp@harlequin.com)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The phone rings at the Genoa City Police Department.  Salina Wiley grabs the
phone and answers, "GCPD."  We hear a woman's voice at the other end of the
phone.  "Call off the dogs, I did it, ok?"  Salina covers the mouthpiece of
the phone and asks, "Isn't the canine unit off today?"  Another detective
nods.  "Uh, ma'am, I'm not sure what you're talking about--dogs--but ours
are not on duty today.  If you have a problem with dogs, you'll be wanting
to call the dog c--" "No, no.  I was speaking metaphorically," Phyllis says.
"With intellect like you guys show sometimes, it's a wonder you tracked me
down."  "Ma'am, we haven't tracked you down.  I have no idea what you're
talking about."  "You haven't?  But I thought you'd just figured out who
tried to run down Paul and the bug--uh, Crick--uh, Christine Williams."
"Oh, no ma'am.  We have no idea who did that."  "Oh! Ok, well never mind
then."  Phyllis hangs up the phone and dials another number, but it's busy.

It's the Private Dining Room.  Seated around a large table are Paul and
Cricket, Kurt and Hope, Nikki and Joshua, Victoria and Cole, and Nina (next
to an empty seat).  Everyone is dressed formally and is sipping drinks.
Paul calls for their attention by tapping a wine glass.  "OK, let's review
the facts," he says.  Cricket nods and turns to Nikki, "First, there's Nikki
Landers and that disappearing cyst."  Nikki covers her lap with her napkin
and says indignantly, "Excuse me? Just how do you know about that?"  Before
Cricket can answer, Paul turns to Kurt and says, "And you, mysterious
stranger.  What are those voices we always hear when you're alone?"  Cricket
has turned to Joshua and continues the rapid pace interrogation with him,
"And what about that wife of yours?  We found out she exists, but now that
fact is being ignored!"  "Hey!"  says Malcolm entering the dining room,
dressed in a tux, "I bet you folk ain't EVEN gonna ask about that little bit
of hanky panky between me and Dru?  Talk about things forgotten!"

Neil is with Jack in his office.  "Ya know, Jack, I just don't get this
thing with Drucilla.  Things used to be so much simpler.  Drucilla knew her
place.  She took care of Lily, she had dinner ready when I came home, and
she didn't complain either." Jack nods and starts to reply, but Neil
continues, "We just used to be happier when she didn't demand so much."
Jack starts to reply again, "I feel for you, Neil--" but he is again cut
off.  "Anyway, as you know, that isn't why I came by--did you get that
report on `Salary Equity by Race' I submitted earlier today?"

Back in the Private Dining Room, Malcolm walks to the empty seat by Nina.
"This place taken?" he asks.  Nina shakes her head. "No, help yourself," she
says politely.  Paul turns to Nina, raising his eyebrows knowingly. "He'll
have to help himself, won't he. You can't help him.  You can't help anyone.
What HAS happened to you?  You used to be such a strong person, and then you
just threw it all out the window for no apparent reason.  Definitely a clue
of some sort."  Victoria looks hopelessly confused, "Clue?"  "That's right,"
says Cricket meeting Victoria's eyes and trying to stare her down.  "Don't
think we've forgotten that Cole has a gun and that your fingerprints are on
it."  Hope, too, looks confused. "You act like you're trying to solve a
mystery of some kind," she says.  "We are," says Paul. "The mystery is this:
why are we getting all of these clues when there's no apparent mystery to be
solved?  Mystery enough, don't you think?"

The phone rings at the Genoa City Police Department.  Salina again grabs it
and says, "GCPD."  "I want to confess," says a male voice.  "I'll need a bit
more information," she says.  "The Mr. and Mrs. Williams--well, they weren't
married then--but I tried to run them down."  Salina says, "How odd, I just
received a call from someone else on that."  "Phyllis Romalatti?"  "It could
have been, now that you mention it.  She didn't give her name."  "Well, she
didn't do it, I tell you.  I did it," Tim says.  "I thought she might try to
confess to save my good name, but don't believe a word she says.  She's a
good and decent person, and I can't let her do it when she's got her whole
life ahead of her.  No, I have to confess.  How late are you open?  Can I
come down today and turn myself in?"

Jack is still staring out his office window.  "Neil, life used to be so much
simpler," he says wistfully as the camera draws back to show that Neil is no
longer present to hear the remark.  Screen fuzz tells us we're flashing back
to when Neil was present.  "Neil, I'm not going to mince words.  Either it's
the year 1950 and the little woman's place is in the home and the black man
gets a black salary, or it's going on 2000 where men and women, black and
white, are equals.  Your choice, Neil."

The flashback voice is still echoing "Your choice, Neil."  but the image
dissolves to Neil, who is entering his house.  "Jack, I can't believe you'd
do this too me!" Neil says to the opening door.  "Hi, honey, how was work?"
Drucilla asks cautiously.  "Oh, Dru, you wouldn't believe it if I told you.
Jack is living in the dark ages--" "No!" Dru says, disbelievingly.  "Yo!" he
says (in his best Y&Rbonics translation of "Way!").  "I wrote a report
saying the brothers' salaries didn't match up to whitey's and you know what
he said?  He said `tough' that it wasn't ever gonna change!"

"But we have the answer," Paul says.  Cricket looks at him, "We do?"  Paul
nods, and begins to explain.  "Long ago, Joshua and Hope and Kurt were
siblings in an orphanage.  Triplets, actually.  I see it in your eyes--many
of you thought it might be the twins thing, but now you see it's something
very, VERY different.  Anyway, they each went to different families, but
retained a lingering psychic connection that would one day draw them
together again.  Later in life, Joshua used to talk about the good old days
at the orphanage until it drove his first wife crazy.  So she voluntarily
committed herself to a sanitarium and he went on to become a doctor.  Then,
Joshua's vision started to wane and he accidentally diagnosed a cyst for
Nikki--which he later covered for by saying it had gone away."  Heads are
bobbing gradually, and we cut to commercial to let the full magnitude of
these developments sink in.

Neil picks up from before, "So you see why I need you at home honey?
Without those promotions I deserve, I'll have to work twice as hard just to
break even and I need you in the home so we don't have to be hiring
sitters...."  Dru sounds unconvinced: "Uh, huh." Then she adds sweetly,
"Honey?"  His answer is an abrupt and irritated "What?"  "Jack called a
little while ago.  He was worried that maybe -- well, that you might not
repeat what he'd said the way he said it."  "He did?  Well, he didn't have
to do that."  "Uh, huh, I think he did have to," Dru says back.  She
continues: "But I told him that's ok, that we already had lots of money from
my modeling job so that we really didn't even need what he was underpaying
you -- and he was soooo nice about it.  He agreed right then and there that
he was being a real heel by paying you so low for such a good job, and he
agreed to just let you go rather than forcing you through such a trauma.
Wasn't that nice of him?  So just shut your trap and pack for Tahiti 'cuz
you ain't underpaid no more."

Paul continues his tale, "Meanwhile, Kurt's hearing was going.  So instead
of seeing things, he started hearing things!  BUT, like the cyst, none of
this was real.  Which brings us to Cole.  Cole figured out what was going on
from some of Nina's research notes.  But no matter how much he would tell
himself `truth is stranger than fiction' he still couldn't accept the fact
that this could happen in real life while if he were to try such a plot in
his books, it would never sell.  He was jealous of this master plot that
reality had woven, and so he'd made up his mind to kill Hope, Joshua, and
Kurt!"  Cricket, seeing where Paul is going with this, tidies up the loose
ends: "Right.  So Cole bought a gun and waited until Victoria's fingerprints
were on it.  Tonight, after dinner, he would have shot them all and his wife
would have been blamed."  Cricket turns to Nina and says, "It was you he
wanted, Nina, not that spoiled brat Victoria." Nina smiles her first big
smile in weeks.  Cricket mutters, "It would have served her right, too.
There's nothing worse than the daughter of some rich guy who thinks she's in
line to inherit the world!"  Police enter and haul off Cole.  Cricket turns
to Nina and says, "Easy come, easy go, Nina."  Nina nods understandingly.
Everyone seems happy (except perhaps Malcolm, who still looks miffed that no
one cares about his affair with Dru) as credits roll.  The tune of Bless The
Beasts and the Children signals the end of a long, exhausting plot line.